Disclaimer: This may prove to be TMI, but I feel the need to share it.
So, Monday morning early Jeff and I found out that we are going to have a baby. While we know that many desire to keep that news quiet until the end of the first trimester, we made a decision that since we live in community (the Body of Christ), we do not want to walk through anything alone which we do not need to walk through alone. In other words, we want to share our joy with people, and if our joy is followed by heartbreak (whether in miscarriage, or in any other situation), we want to give the church the opportunity to be the church in our lives. Additionally, there is just so much joy in a couple discovering their first pregnancy, it is hard to keep it in and contain it.
This morning I woke up to discover some spotting, and while I know that at only 5 weeks along it is perfectly normal (not that it happens in all pregnancies, but it is not necessarily something to flip out over). However, it was also followed by the quick realization that Jeff and I both seem to have come down with a pretty intense intestinal bug. I was worried and I called my midwife and she encouraged me to drink some kefir and/or maybe a little (like 2 oz) of wine to help kill the bug, to take it easy, and to try to take my mind off of any thoughts of miscarriage. She advised me to ask Jeff to lay hands on me and pray (which he had already been doing all morning), and to stay at home and rest. She reminded me that, this early on there really is not something we can do either way except for pray. A well established pregnancy is a well established pregnancy, as she said.
So I am praying. Any of you are also welcome to pray. And I am knowing that being as sick as I am right now does not necessarily mean it will compromise this pregnancy. But I wanted to share, because this is the decision that Jeff and I made together; to let the church be the church in our lives, and to trust God with our joys and our sorrows. I had no idea I would have to face the fear of that so soon, but my mother reminded me that I am facing just that: the fear. Right now that is all that is definitely threatening us.
Thanks for love and for prayers.
Edit: Just thought anyone reading might like to know that, except for being exhausted, my symptoms seem to have subsided, including the spotting. A huge answer to prayer.